Instead of screaming into the void of Twitter, I bring you a weekly highlight reel of what it’s like going places in Greater Hartford when one is gloriously car-free. These posts are on a slight time delay because nobody needs to know exactly where I am when I am there.

SEASONAL SIGHTS 
If you’ve tried to maintain your dignity by saying shit like “I’m my own Valentine,” then this post is for you. Every holiday seems to come with its own litter, and Valentine’s Day is no exception, from the discarded box of chocolates to the panda who has apparently given her heart away, only to be cruelly tossed in the gutter.

Fine, it’s not all awful. Some cutiepie with chalk left this message on a school sidewalk: 

And Lincoln was rendered less condescending by the simple act of putting a bouquet in his hand. 

On a park sidewalk, there is this message, which is not Valentine’s Day exactly, but there are hearts.

FALSE ADVERTISEMENT

1/10 do not recommend.
The sign says there are kisses. There are not.

GOTH SHAMING 
There is so much rotten advice out there. If you walk, you’ve no doubt been told to walk with someone else, especially if you’re female, especially after dark. As if trouble only emerges when the sun goes down.

It’s infantilizing. It’s insulting. 

It was old when I was admonished to walk with others when I was heading off the college. You can imagine how exhausted I am hearing it. . . advice typically given by those who walk nowhere except perhaps inside of a shopping mall or a park.

I was thinking about this as I walked home alone at night from watching a movie. Making plans with other people is not a thing I generally think to do, and what I saw probably would not have appealed to anyone who was also willing to sit masked in a theater for two hours. If I were not to transport my own self home on foot, bike, or scooter, then my other option would be to get into a car driven by a stranger who may or may not be masked. It would be expensive, and it feels like a waste when the walk is only fifteen minutes. I did not move from the exurbs to a city so that I would be tied to a car.

Besides, I’m an adult, FFS. 

While walking, I reached in my bag for my flashlight, which I sometimes have out at night to turn on at intersections where I know the drivers are not paying attention; they may not notice hi-vis, but they sure seem to see a flashlight aimed directly at them. The light was there, but also, a few rocks I’d forgotten were in my bag. 

There’s a lesson in this, and it’s not for me. Perhaps others should assume that the cranky woman walking by them has a secret stash of rocks and that maybe this woman played shortstop and is not opposed to causing property damage.

Again, I will refer everyone to one of my favorite films:





But this isn’t about the rocks or the light. 

This is about goth shaming. Because those who give advice of the “don’t walk alone at night” variety are also wont to advise people to bedeck themselves in bright colors, in hi-vis. 

It’s a distraction. 

This red coat is what I wore when having yet another near miss, which was only a miss because I moved myself out of the way. If you’ve been reading this for awhile, you can guess the circumstances: I was in crosswalk during exclusive pedestrian phase; driver blew through red light, making a left turn on red. He never saw me because he was not looking. 

It is as bright of a coat as it looks, and a few friends recently remarked on it — one noting how she could see me all the way down the block. 

It does not matter what you wear as a pedestrian.  A video showing this has been making the rounds on social media. It shows a driver speeding into a school crossing guard who is wearing bright clothing. (The crossing guard is reportedly “okay,” whatever that means)

So, if my red coat won’t protect me and a bright orange jacket won’t protect a crossing guard, what is my incentive to not dress the way I would like to? What if Valentine’s Day has me feeling like I’m also unloveable and need to “wear black on the outside cause black is how I feel on the inside”? And now that Nicolas Cage has announced that he is a goth, literally saying “I am a goth,” are we not obligated to support his choice and ensure that our streets are safe for the actor and his pet crow to walk down?

UNSEASONAL DEBRIS 
It’s not all discarded hearts. There were actually two doll arms, from two different dolls, on one block. I have questions, Park Terrace. 

UNMASKING FASCISM 

The connection is obvious. The Patriot Front stickers appearing in same area of town as the “Unmask Our Kids” stickers, because if it walks like a fascist and quacks like a white supremacist, and I wish I were joking, but the number of times I’ve heard antisemitic trash come from the mouths of these “free breathers” . . .

First of all, tell me you’ve never been to a comic con without telling me. Those kids (and adults) are ultra masked and having the time of their lives. Is the mental health of children and adults suffering right now? Absofuckinglutely, but don’t blame protective measures. Look to the continued death count, the sickness, the excruciating knowledge of how fragile life is. Look to how others loudly value profits over the health and well-being of people. Look to the selfishness of those who won’t absorb the discomfort for a few minutes or few hours, prolonging all of this. Want to improve the mental health of our community? It’s not by stripping away protective measures.

Alright, so besides those stickers, there’s other nonsense out there. While out to fetch a coffee on my lunchbreak — and this is on me — I stupidly forgot that the unmaskers were gathered at the State Capitol, which is between the coffee and my house. It was one of my least favorite walks that did not involve being threatened by someone behind the wheel of a car. To get a taste of who is calling for the stripping of protective measures, see this post about a car I passed parked by the rally. By the way, it’s a rule that when you read or hear “unmask our kids,” you must roll your eyes. 

GLARING 
Below, thick, glare ice on the Burns School sidewalk, days after any ice event took place. 

And, they aren’t the only ones to neglect their property. Who leaves their curb ramp blocked TWO WEEKS after the major snow event ended? That would be the Hartford Fire Department on New Britain and Fairfield Avenue. 

WHAT NEXT 

  • Too much time on your hands? The Connecticut Department of Transportation is seeking public transit passengers to participate in a virtual focus group. Register here.